Adapted from an older post. … And yes, this is still something I struggle with.
I work with some of the most beautiful women I know. You know the type. Flawless skin, clothes that fit just right, jewelry that’s understated yet fashionable, and hair that always looks good, even when she claims it’s dirty. Her shoes always fit the occasion, and she likely doesn’t own any “fat jeans.” Even her mother doesn’t have an awkward picture of her.
Sometimes I have what I call “off days.” Days when my confidence is shot, when my outfit doesn’t quite work and I generally feel icky. These are days that I could easily be jealous of the seemingly perfect women walking around, but it’s harder when they’re nice.
I’ve told Pete about my off days and he tells me I’m ridiculous. He calls me beautiful on a regular basis and says I look nice on the days I least expect it, but sometimes I have a hard time believing it. Sometimes I just don’t feel like one of the pretty ones.
I doubt there’s a female in this world who hasn’t wanted to look or be different in some way at some point in her life. If only I were taller, shorter, slimmer, curvier, had straight hair, curly hair, darker skin, lighter skin, etc., etc., etc.
Heck, sometimes I even avoid eye contact because I don’t want to guess what people are thinking about me. Even though most of the time, they’re probably thinking about something completely different.
Social media and checkout line magazines certainly don’t help.
A couple of weeks ago, I was searching for images of a certain celebrity for a work assignment. After scrolling through one gorgeous photo after another on her Instagram page, I felt pretty low about myself. I wish I looked like that, I thought. And then, How does she manage to look amazing in EVERY SINGLE PICTURE?! There are hundreds of them!
And so begins the comparison game.
I remember asking my friend several years ago why one of my worst features couldn’t be different.
“Because then something else would be wrong with you,” she said.
Her point was that no one is perfect. And while I do think it’s important to take care of yourself, feel good about yourself and to consider how you’re presenting yourself, whining about the things you dislike or wishing you were someone else entirely won’t get you anywhere.
In light of my insecurities, I’m continually convicted by this verse:
“The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”
—1 Samuel 16:7
There it is, plain as day. God doesn’t care what you look like; He cares about the heart. And does anyone else’s opinion matter? Even my own?
It’s pretty amazing to realize that the perfectly loving, perfectly wise God who made the heavens and the earth also made me, and that He doesn’t make mistakes. By beating myself down, it’s like beating down His creation, and, well, that’s just not cool. He loves me completely, unconditionally, no matter what I look like.
I still get self-conscious—that’s not going to change overnight—but I’m working on seeing myself in God’s eyes instead. And trying to focus on things that matter and that last instead of whatever physical flaw I see in the mirror.
“I am fearfully and wonderfully made; wonderful are Your works, and my soul knows it very well.”
– Psalm 139:14
You are a masterpiece created by God Himself. How can you focus inward instead of outward this week?